As I read the words on the My Mercy App stating “large disc extrusion on the right at L5-S1 with cranial extension” I sat on the brown leather recliner, unable to move nor able to process what this meant. I previously shared in a blog post that my sister, who is a nurse, compassionately shared that I would probably need a procedure to heal my back, but what I didn’t realize at the time was that my husband’s response to potential surgery would become a profound, life-giving catch phrase for our family. He could see in my eyes that the longer I lingered over the test results, the more my thoughts spiraled into a ball of stress. After sixteen years of marriage, he knew that I felt queasy at the mere idea of getting blood taken, so he realized the idea of back surgery would overwhelm me. His first words to me about the test results were, “The good news is that this is fixable.” 

At first I thought his words were slightly flippant and not very compassionate. However, the longer I lingered with those words, playing them like a soundtrack in my head on repeat, “This is fixable. This is fixable. This. Is. Fixable,” the braver I became about taking the next steps toward surgery. 

As a “words” girl, I often replay conversations in my mind, thinking through the deeper meaning behind spoken phrases. As I thought through Nathan’s words, I realized “this is fixable” wasn’t lacking compassion, it was a life-giving phrase of hope. Although the idea of surgery was scary and the pain was debilitating, the idea that this injury didn’t have to be permanent and that I could be healed kept me going. 

The more the phrase “this is fixable ” rolled around in my mind, without meaning to, I started using this phrase with the kids. 

• When they emptied too much toothpaste on the bathroom counter and said, “Oh no, Mom! I’m so sorry to have made such a mess.” Instead of saying, “How many times have I told you ‘dot, dot, not a lot’ with the toothpaste container?” I started responding with, “This is fixable. Let’s come up with a plan to clean it up. What do you think we should start with to clean it up?” 
• When they forgot to charge their chromebooks the night before and frantically came to me before breakfast. Instead of responding with, “I told you to charge it before you went to sleep. Why didn’t you bring it to Dad’s office?” I started responding with, “This is fixable. Why don’t you charge it while we eat and then again in my classroom before you head to the gym. With those combined charging times, you should be ready to go for the day.”

Three simple words. This. is. fixable. 

Sometimes when we focus on our mistakes, every day situations feel like it’s the end of the world. However, if we peek outside for a few moments, we can realize the sky isn’t falling like Chicken Little feared. Yes, there will be times in our kids’ lives that their actions will have more lasting consequences. However, sometimes I wonder if we put too much pressure on ourselves and our children?

If every mistake feels like “it’s the end of the world” then how will we have the stamina to handle the things in life that aren’t fixable? If we constantly live in a state of high cortisol and anxiety, how can we give ourselves enough grace to see potential solutions? I’m starting to wonder if building resilience comes from realizing that for many situations in life, we have the power to right the wrongs we have created and we can fix things. We might not like the path it takes to correct our mistakes, but in time, we can fix them. 

“This is fixable” has become the pause our souls needed to add on to our other new go-to catch phrase, “I just haven’t learned that yet.” Because “I just haven’t learned that yet,” I can be humble to work through my mistakes, because after all, most mistakes are fixable.

There may not be a best-selling author that I can attribute this phrase to, but sometimes the most life-giving phrases come from unlikely conversations. Thankfully today I am enjoying pain-free and numb-free living five weeks post surgery. I’m feeling a million times better. Although I do NOT want to relive the experience of nerve pain and disc herniation again, I am thankful for these life-giving lessons that our family has learned through the process. Years of lifting heavy things and injuring my lower back over and over again led to needing surgery to fix my mistakes. I’m thankful to know that like my back injury could be fixable, other mistakes can be fixable, too. 

• Was the healing process fun? Not at all. 
• Did it take longer than I had hoped? Yes. 
• Have I learned new strategies in the process? Absolutely. 

I am determined to do all I can to avoid the mistakes I made in the past that might have led to this injury. 

Friend, I pray that you will hear the hope filled phrase “this is fixable” this week as you encounter your own mistakes. For the most part, many of the challenges that we go through in life are thankfully fixable. To recognize this, it helps to have someone like Nathan to help us see the bigger picture. I wonder who might be a “Nathan” in your life? The kind of person who helps you pull back from feeling overwhelmed and see how this is just a step along your journey. If you have that kind of personality, then I am thanking the Lord for how you help your loved ones and friends see another perspective. Let’s take a deep breath today and realize whatever mistake we make today, it’s most likely fixable.